Fear is griping, controlling, and ominous. It can dictate our paths and leave us as a crippled spectator in the game of life.
There are many times I have stepped out regardless of fear and felt victorious. While there are other times I have stepped out, facing my fears and chasing my dreams, and fell flat on my face.
Something inside of me only remembers the failures. Failing makes me want to give up and play it safe. When you are playing it safe you can't get hurt. There is no danger. However, there is no room for joy.
Every time I have found out that I was expecting, I was scared to death. I could not figure out how I could be a mom or go through pregnancy. It never made sense. No matter that each time the circumstances were different. Sometimes better and sometimes worse. I was frightened.
Had I let my fear dictate my life I would have missed out. Yes, children can be excruciatingly difficult but they can also bring excruciating joy. Joy that can be painful because it feels like your heart might explode.
The book of Joshua keeps popping up in my life lately. God continuously tells Joshua not to be afraid. One might think Joshua had such strong faith that he would never fear. However, something tells me if God had to continue to remind him not to be afraid that he must have been scared to death.
Maybe I'm not alone. Maybe being afraid doesn't mean my faith is lacking to the point that God can't use me. Maybe it is lacking to the point that he can pick me up and carry me when I don't have the strength and I can't see how things will turn out in the end. Maybe that can be used for His glory.
They are the reason that I shouldn't fear. They are looking to me to teach them how to live life. How to live it to the fullest and find happiness and joy in every moment. How to be an encourager and how to look for encouragement.
I never want them to settle for a life less than all the adventures God has planned for them.